Everything starts with your emotions. Everything you have, everything you share and everything you get. It’s all connected to your emotions. We feel that we miss a person, we show them love. We feel pleasure by doing something, we keep doing it. We feel fulfillment by helping others so we keep doing it. But what exactly educating your emotions means?
We feel that we miss a person, we show them love. We feel pleasure by doing something, we keep doing it. We feel fulfillment by helping other so we keep doing it. But what exactly educating your emotions means?
Have you ever heard of the expression “loving like a child”? Ironically, this means you are emotionally mature. Being unable to properly express your love, happiness, and even sadness means that you are emotionally immature. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been there, I’ve done that. Is not something you cannot control or you are born with. It’s something that we can grow and mature like we grow and mature our minds. Once you get the steps and practice them daily, everything is smooth and beautiful. So let’s get to action: I tell you the steps into properly educate your emotions.
Step nr. 1 – Understand your emotions
You can’t control something you don’t understand! This is the number one rule. Understand your emotions. Why do you feel like that? What is causing that? What can you do to change that if it’s a bad emotion, and how can you amplify it if it’s a good emotion? Explore your feelings daily and find patterns. You will see there are some things that make you feel bad and some things that make you feel good. Understand which is which.
And very importantly, don’t link your emotions for something external. Link your emotions to something you can control! For example, if I am with a girl and she does something to me that hurts me real bad, I need to see the situation in a way I can control it. It’s simply done by linking my pain to my poor choices, and not to her actions.
Because I can’t control her actions, but I CAN control my choices. I can control myself. So, I take responsibility for poor choices and that will help me get better next time I choose. Make sense?
If you link your emotions to something that is out of your control, you will get addicted and vulnerable. That’s how you get hurt. It doesn’t matter if we talk about good emotions or bad ones. The only one responsible for what you FEEL is YOURSELF. That is something you can control.
Step nr. 2 – Express your emotions in the kindest and warmest way possible
We all have needs, desires, requirements and feelings that should be taken care of. But while you express your feelings it’s ideal to not hurt the other one’s feelings. Don’t take the excuse “oh, I was angry and that’s why I said that”. No, you weren’t. You had an opinion that wasn’t expressed in time, it built up anger and you lost control. We can always express our emotions in a sweet way.
For example: Instead of telling your lover “oh, you did that again. OMG! You know how much it bothers me!”, say it “Honey, I would really appreciate if you would do …. instead of … . Please!” Well, this isn’t that much of a fight, isn’t it? 🙂 That’s the idea, you can express any feelings you have in a sweet way. Because feelings are sweet.
Let me give you another example.
I am a jealous type of person, but instead of going like “Who is that?! I saw him talking to you!!!”, I will tell her: “Can you tell me please who was that? I am so jealous because I love you so much.” You see how anything can be cute?
Random cute examples: “I love you so much that I am afraid I might lose you someday” , “I want you to be a part of my life forever”, “I love your attention so much and I appreciate it when you call me and compliment me. Would you do that more?”, “I love to watch that TV show with you, but do you think we can watch my football game tonight? I would really appreciate it.”
Anything can be expressed in a sweet way. Learn how to express your feelings kindly. Not because you don’t have the right to do it, but because you care so much about your loved one that you don’t want to hurt hers / his when you express yourself. And your special someone will appreciate your kindness a lot.
Step nr. 3 – Amplify your good emotions
Once you found out what makes you feel good keep practicing it. It’s all into giving. We have feelings to share them. Honestly, that’s the only reason we have them. It’s God’s way to make us express what we feel.
You found your good emotions and what triggers them in the first step. Now you repeat whatever makes you feel happy, loved, compassionate, joyful, fulfilled. Make time every day to light up your feelings. Love and happiness are like a fire. It burns out a long time, but it’s best to be fueled daily so you would NEVER run out of it.
What good insight you will take from this article and apply to your love life? Share it with us in the comments. I wish you a life filled with love!