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First Rule in Love: Give More than You Expect to Receive

We all want the best from life: a happy successful life, a loving relationship, true friends and all our dreams coming true. But if we get in the extreme where we expect other people to make us feel in a certain way, we will affect our mood.

You are the master of your own emotions

Maybe you heard it for the first time or not, but your soul resonates with this sentence. You are the master of your own feelings! You control what do you feel right now. Period.

Yes, we make our own happiness. We make our own love. We build those emotions inside of us and we just share them with the ones we love. Having expectations of somebody coming into your life and making you feel happy and loved, it quickly turn into desperation when no one shows around. In a second you start to feel loneliness and depression and disappointment because you expect something from the outer world to ignite something in the inner world. Do you understand what I am trying to say?

Basically, what most people tend to do, is that they associate an external event to an emotion. For example: I have a boyfriend / girlfriend that means I am loved, I have friends that mean I am confident, I have people watch my back that means I am safe. You see all these patterns? This is simply an addiction towards external factors. We need to first see these things to trigger the emotions inside of us.

The truth is you can trigger all those happy cheerful emotions now! Just like snapping your fingers. Just by switching your focus. Instead of waiting for others to do, you can focus on what you do. Instead of thinking what you don’t have, appreciate what you do have. There are people in your life now that loves you, think about them, think about your family. How is that making you feel? Good, I bet.

Now let’s turn things up a notch. We all have a dream of a perfect relationship that will make us feel like heaven. Let’s think about it like it’s already in our life. Imagine that, how it would be, where you will get married, how many kids you will have. And realize that it’s just a matter of time before you will see your dreams come alive. Now, this creates better and happier feelings. I am thinking with you now and I feel my soul getting filled with love and joy.

I know that I will find my soul mate at the right time when I am ready. We all should know that.

Have love standards but don’t expect everyone to match them

I said it once and I will say it again: you have to know what you want! Clearly, obviously, vision it. Write it down with details on your journal and read it every day. Make it a part of your life.

Now, when we talk about our perfect relationship we all should have the standards that make us feel good, feel complete. We all have the right to do it. We are talking here about the person with whom we will share our lives. Our significant other. This is truly important! In fact, if you ask me, is the most important aspect of our lives. So we need to treat it with commitment and boldness.

The first rule of having something you desire most is eliminating any other possibility. This means to have high standards. I decide what I truly want from my love life and I say “I will have it and I won’t accept nothing less!”  This is my standard, this is how I see life and the only way I allow it to be. Make sense?

So, I will make it clear: I want my life partner to be like that, and that, and do that, act like that, speak like that, and everything with details. I will even write it down and read it every day so it sticks to my mind. THIS is what I will have because I decided it like this.

Here is where some people find conflict in their relationship: they have different standards. If I want something and you want something else, no matter how much we love each other, the relationship will fall apart. We all going in life after what makes us truly happy and fulfilled. There’s no shortcut, no side track. My point is, I know what I want exactly from my love life but I don’t expect that everyone will want the same. That will disappoint me a lot.

Most of the people are different and we have to accept that. We can’t expect to match with every single person on Earth. We need only to match with our soul mate, and we do, that’s why it’s called a soul mate.

Bottom line, as you can see, having love standards not only that makes you go after what you want and find it, but also helps you recognize your soul mate because he / she have the same standards as you. You are a match made in Heaven.

You might also like: Get your Standards Right for a Happy Relationship

Make sure you match your standards: give more than you expect to receive

This is very important part also. After I decided what I want from my partner I need to realize what I will bring to theFirst rule in love give more than you expect to receive table. What I need to offer to deserve what I want. You can’t just ask without offering in return, it’s obvious.

We talking about a relationship here, a marriage. A marriage is built by two partners. They both have to bring trust, love, compassion, understanding, honesty, commitment. You can’t change somebody else, you can’t educate somebody else, but you can change and educate yourself.

Romanticism is an art. Love is an art. Learn it, master it, practice it.

Offer more than you expect to receive. This is the beauty of love: the more you give it the more you have it. You already have standards which act like fences and only those that match your heart description will climb those walls. So focus on making a very welcoming staying for those that decide they want your heart, your emotions, your time.

Make sure you are the greatest lover in the world. That will change the course of your life into a heavenly love story.

Love is the most valuable treasure we have. Love is everything!

Cornel Manu

Self-help author, ghostwriter, and copywriter. Founder of & I love helping people have a better life by improving their health and their mindset. I am also a freelance writer that crafts amazing books, SEO articles, and killer copy. Hire me as freelance writer.

This Post Has One Comment

  1. Seneca

    Thank you for this great post Cornel! I look forward to your next ones.

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